I give up

I am back from the Beijing trip. It is unexpectedly fun. There are a lots to say about the trip and my feeling toward the people and Beijing.

I was in a very good mood before the trip, I know the reason, but I dont know if it is what I think. I am trying to use this trip to think about it. I do hope I can have a better understanding of my situation and a better picture of the issue, just like what I mentioned in my previous piece of blog.

Well, its so bad that the trip didnt help a lots in this matter. I still dont understand my situation, and the picture in my mind is not clear neither.

I did try to figure it out but I am getting more and more confused.

Yes or no? Continue or not? Try or not? Give up or not? Right or wrong?

Humm, I m thinking to give up. I tried my best to do something, I can certify it if there is no feedback. Maybe I've mistaken it. Maybe I should not be still thinking, okay, I decided to give up, and I'd better to.

I may not be as happy as before, but this has brought me a chance to quit my bad habits anyway, so this expereince is kind of positive still.

Case is certified, file is closed.

My friend may feel strange with this blog coz it is the first time that I write in English. Yes, it is a bit strange but I promise, it wont always happen. I may not be able to fully express myself in English, but everytime I write / speak in English, I feel like I am talking about someone else but not myself. It is easier to express it naturally in some topics.

Next blog will be back to Chinese :-)